there is a time for quiet

i feel alone. i like the quiet around me.

i enjoy that moment. a peace comes to me. outside voices interrupt my train. stop asking me questions. you've called me out. you've asked for me to quit helping. is that a call for help? are you craving more attention? 

i've been putting your train back on the tracks for years and to hear it come screeching to a halt. have you derailed. is that what you want? are you looking to get off? do you want something different?

i do not understand.

it's not my game. it's not my story. 

i like the silence. so i retreat to it for a moment longer. i crave connection. 

i don't want to look at you. i won't do it. i have that choice.

why the sudden reverse? why does someone else's comments about putting on the brakes stop you. your train can continue. your train is destined for greatness. 

be okay with going at different speeds. not all can keep up. 

accept it as it is and be gentle. be kind. 

and breathe. breathe in the beauty that has just reawakened in you.